I have been going through something lately where God keeps showing up. The only way I know how to describe it is as if he told me (in the kindest way possible) to, “Sit down and shut up.”
He started showing me a picture of Mary sitting at his feet and told me this is where he would have me, IF I would surrender. Ouch! I thought I was surrendered and serving Him.
Human Doing?
Luke 10:38-42. 38 While they were traveling, He entered a village, and a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her home.[a]39 She had a sister named Mary, who also sat at the Lord’s[b] feet and was listening to what He said.[c] 40 But Martha was distracted by her many tasks, and she came up and asked, “Lord, don’t You care that my sister has left me to serve alone? So tell her to give me a hand.”[d]
41 The Lord[e] answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but one thing is necessary. Mary has made the right choice,[f] and it will not be taken away from her.” HCSB
For a long time, I have resented Mary or the idea of her. I have always been a “doer,” a Martha if you will. She seemed to have a gift of hospitality and service. All my jobs have had some form of customer service. I am a first born and my top love language is acts of service. If that wasn’t enough, both sides of my family were in missions or church ministry so I come by it honestly. I had even been getting my identity and/or value from my doing. This would show up any time I had not done “enough” or had executed imperfectly. Then I would feel bad about myself and even feel like I let people down. I am not talking about mismanagement.
God’s recent invitation for me to sit with Him was about my death-grip on my task-list, my agenda, my responsibilities, and about my lack of prioritizing HIM. It is surrendering my worry; my fear of failure and need to people-please. The idol of perfection must come down. The only way I could fail at sitting before Jesus is if I don’t do it.
“…One thing is necessary;
Mary has made the right choice.”
So I choose to sit at his feet. Sometimes I worship, sometimes I pray, but I actively try to just sit and listen. Occasionally, I have to rebuke the lie that I am being lazy. I am being obedient and sitting at my Savior’s feet. I can tell you that any day that I purposefully put Him first, even with the daily grind and our tumultuous world, because I know that He is there, I am at peace. When the God of love captures your heart, there is no room for worry and anxiety.
And Samuel said, “Has the LORD as great a delight in burn offerings and sacrifices as in obedience to the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed [is better] than the fat of rams.” 1 Samuel 15:22
BONUS THOUGHT: Martha may have had some Melancholy Temperament, meaning that she was task-driven as opposed to relationship-oriented. Melancholies also tend to expect others to work as hard as they do and to their high standards (perfectionism). Also, I’ve heard it said that the precursory emotion to resentment is envy. Having said that, I’m wondering if Martha was jealous of Mary and her sitting at Jesus’ feet.
PRAYER FOR YOU: Jesus, I choose to surrender my life and my agenda to You. I reject the spirit of fear and worry and anxiety. Forgive me for not putting You first, God. Help me to prioritize time with you today and to feel your love for me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.